How astrology can improve your sex life

 If I told you I can predict all your sexual desires, kinks, and fantasies – would you believe me?

 

I am an intimacy doula and use sex astrology to help my clients claim their ‘sexual being’.

 

After studying psychology and biology, a masters degree, and later becoming a dominatrix in a Manhattan dungeon (that’s another story!), I taught myself astrology.

 

I started practicing sex astrology because my partner and I appeared to be on two different pages when it came to sex – it seemed like I lived on Mars and he was raised on Venus.

 

Then a friend told me ‘your man is a Taurus, you have to be romantic, sensual, and play with his balls – Taurus men LOVE that.‘

 

Skeptically, I tested out her theory on my boo, and to my surprise, it worked. I was already on my journey to becoming an astrologer when I was given that advice, so I knew there had to be more to sex astrology than just a person’s sun sign (also known as your star sign).

 

I believe that someone’s sun sign can tell you a significant amount of information on their sexual inclinations and desires but I wanted to understand a person beyond the obvious.

 

I knew because I am a Sagittarius that I prefer sex to be an adventure, and that because I’m a Scorpio rising that I have enchanting eyes and an intense presence. When I found out I had a 12th house Venus in Scorpio? Well that’s when I realised I had some serious intimacy issues.

 

A beginner's guide to astrology

 

Astrology: the study of how the stars, planets and other cosmic objects move, the relationship between them and how these influence human life and the world around us.

 

Horoscope: an astrological chart or diagram depicting the position of the sun, moon and planets at a particular place and time.

 

Houses: the term used to describe the 12 divided segments of the Zodiac. Each house is ruled by a different Zodiac sign.

 

Moon sign: this represents your emotions and is the next most important influence in the Zodiac after your sun sign.

 

Natal chart: also known as a birth chart, this is a map of your life and shows who you are and who you will become, according to the universe.

 

Rising sign: also known as your ‘ascendent’ it is the sign that was ‘rising’ up over the horizon in the east at the time of your birth.

 

Sun sign: also known as your star sign or your sign of the Zodiac.

 

From that point on, I was convinced that if you’re trying to use astrology to wow someone sexually, that it is an absolute must to get a hold of their birth chart.

 

A birth chart tells you exactly where the planets were at someone’s moment of birth, and once I have my client’s birth time, date, and location, that’s when the real magic happens.

 

While I will only read for people who know their birth time (it’s crucial to discovering house placements and rising sign) there’s still a lot that you learn by checking which signs the planets fell into during their birth date.

 

When I explore a person’s birth chart, I always look for their ‘big three’: their sun, moon, and rising signs.

 

With the sun you can understand how someone feels about themselves at their core. For example, a Leo sun may regard themselves as having a regal aura that exclusively deserves the very best in bed. Sex can feel most fulfilling when the bed is their stage, and all eyes are on them.

 

Having the moon sign allows me to then study my client’s emotional needs and how they express their feelings, which provides clues on what they need to do to have the best sex of their lives.

 

Give that Leo sun a Cancer moon, and before they can feel comfortable to release the beast, they require a safe and comforting connection with a partner (although they might have too much pride to ask).

 

Once you understand those basics you can start learning about Mars, the planet that rules over libido and passion, then their Venus which rules over sexual pleasure. Eventually you will be studying the countless cosmic-bodies in outer space.

 

With someone’s birth time I am able to outline the chapters in their story, ranging from how they express themselves to the world, what their family and home life is like and even their hidden and unconscious desires.

 

Many of my clients experience blocks when it comes to orgasms, and others just need someone to motivate and encourage them.

 

In that case, I suggest studying your fifth house, twelfth house, Moon, Mars, and Venus. When you understand what someone requires emotionally (moon), you can then learn how to get them excited (Mars) then you find out what makes them feel warm and fluffy inside (Venus).

 

Tossing the houses in the mix, the fifth house informs how a person likes to indulge in pleasure and the twelfth house deciphers the fantasies they may not feel comfortable admitting.

 

Someone with a Pisces fifth house may enjoy THC/CBD-infused sexual products but having their 12th house in Libra might mean they desire some type of partnership from their sexual encounters.

 

Sex by the signs

 

Aries: Passionate (and possibly short) bursts of primal and sexual energy, wrestling, biting, and power struggles are all acts that engage the ram.

 

Taurus: Romance is key. Take your time, indulge their bodies, be rough and passionate. Feed them, massage them, set the mood with candles, and watch what happens.

 

Gemini: Open minded! Intrigued by group play and Japanese rope bondage, and can be a lot more flexible in regards to their sexual interests.

 

Cancer: Cancers want to nurture and love those around them. A naturally paternal sign so no surprise they are intrigued by daddy/mummy BDSM play. Breasts are appealing and the chest area may be their erogenous zone.

 

Leo: Drama Queens. They want you to know they’re the best and are willing to put a show. Loves roleplay, dressing in lingerie, and if you pamper them in the bedroom the might just marry you.

 

Virgo: Submissive, they want to serve you. Once comfortable they find escape in BDSM and are right with Gemini when it comes to Japanese rope bondage.

 

Libra: Expect Bonnie and Clyde-type romance. Show them you’re all about reciprocity and you’ll be surprised how far they’ll bend their backs for you. Pamper and please them, they can be pillow princesses.

 

Scorpio: Desperately wants to be intimate, but until they find their soul mate, there’s fetlife. Substitutes vulnerability with passion, so they can love sex that pushes their limits.

 

Sagittarius: Not the most overtly kinky but can be extremely experimental. Will try anything once (and keep trying it unless they don’t like it). Try public or destination sex with these explorers.

 

Capricorn: With time their stern energy follows them into the bedroom.Get a kick out of teasing and being disciplined but be careful: some may be vanilla, others can have you in a full kinky relationship!

 

Aquarius: Can be into the most unconventional sex. If they don’t have to worry about judgement, they’ll test your limits. The downside is that they are ruled by Saturn, so who knows when they’ll completely open up.

 

Pisces: Inherently expansive and open. The can be curious about tantric sex, sex-magic, and sex under the influence. Pisces wants to dive deep into the waters of desire with their partner, then drown in them.

 

There are endless factors that play into human sexuality and I always encourage people to explore their sexual needs and wants without shame.

 

However, if you find your desires to be harmful to yourself or others, seeking out a sex therapist or medical doctor can make a difference.

 

Astrology is an amazing tool that can unlock endless potential, but it’s dangerous when people diagnose themselves or others solely because of what a birth chart says.

 

Astrology works best as a social and spiritual tool for language and self-exploration.